How to Gamify Confidence

It's a pleasant surprise to discover how quickly a few tiny little choices can raise your self-confidence.   Listen now to learn a super fun and easy way to gamify boosting your self-confidence.

This is part 3 of a 3-part series on Confidence. Be sure to check out the other two episodes (21 & 22).

Transcript

Unknown: 0:00

This week, we're talking about confidence. And today we're talking about confidence by another name. We're looking at it from a different perspective. And the reason why is because I think we tend to think people are either confident or they aren't, that people have a certain level of self confidence. And that can't really be changed. Nothing could be further from the truth. Everyone deserves absolute self confidence and self esteem. Anyone is capable of developing higher self confidence and self esteem. And the whole entire world is a better place. When we have this higher confidence and self esteem. If I asked you, What is your definition of competence? How would you describe it? What would you say? I went ahead and looked it up. And this definition that I found, really stopped me in my tracks. It really made me think, let me read it to you. And then I'll explain how this, how I interpreted this and why I find it to be so profound. Here's the definition, quote, the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something, firm trust, and quote. Now, if you insert the word yourself into this, quote, it would be the feeling or belief that one can rely on yourself, for him trust in yourself. This doesn't sound to me, like would be nice, or I'm stuck where I am, you know, with this kind of material. This sounds to me like absolutely vital material. Doesn't everyone deserve to be able to rely on themselves when their life be better if they could rely on themselves? Doesn't everyone deserve to have firm trust in themselves? Wouldn't everyone be better able to make good decisions and show up in life in a positive way? If they had a more firm trust in themselves? I feel that that is the case, right? And as I mentioned, over and over again, I think anybody is capable of increasing their self confidence, and certainly deserving of having the highest self confidence. Okay, so let's play a game. Let me ask you on a scale of one to 10, do you have firm trust in yourself? Can you rely on yourself? So one would be like, nope. I don't trust myself at all. I can't rely on myself at all. And 10 would be absolutely I trust myself, I trust my decisions, or trust how I navigate life, I have firm trust in myself. First thing that comes to mind between one and 10. How would you rate yourself right now? Okay, you've got a number in your mind. Now we want to take that number. And we want to gamify it, every teeny tiny little choice that we make throughout the day, shoot for bumping yourself up just one point on the scale, you can look at absolutely every little choice or interaction or anything that you do during your day. And ask yourself, How can I approach this in a way that will bump me up just one point, to have more firm trust in myself. I'm gonna give you some examples. Just to get you started thinking. So when you go out into your own life today, bumping yourself up just one point on that scale, in easy little ways, and easy little choices that you make all day long. Hopefully some of these examples will just give you ideas, right. And one thing that came to mind for me was food choices. When I make a food choice that I know is kind of self sabotage or not aligned with my ideal self or my goals, then I am undermining my trust in myself. You know, if I think oh, man, maybe I'll order a hoagie. And I'm like, no, that's not a good idea. Maybe I'll stir fry some vegetables, right and throw some chicken in there and make something healthy and delicious. Then I have more trust in myself at the end of the day, cuz I said, you know, girl, you really took care of yourself today with that healthy delicious food choice. Another example is completing tasks. For me, a small but fascinatingly important thing is laundry. And I got into a habit for a while of leaving all of my clothes, clean clothes in a pile on top of the dryer. And when I wanted something, I would just go and rifle through the pile and find something and put it on. Now, of course, inevitably, it's hard to find exactly what you're looking for or be inspired. Things are wrinkled, you know, but I talked the other day about casting votes. Imagine what kind of votes this cast my self confidence, right? So just to boost it up one little point, I organized my closet if you saw my success hacking episode on what to wear, I actually gave away like 80% of my things so I can have a better organized, pared down choices that I really love. And so when I go to the closet and open it up, and I see everything organized and hanging there so nicely, it's me building trust in myself, I can rely on myself to help myself just freakin show. up in life, right? As my best self by this simple little task, such an easy way to raise yourself just one point go from leaving the clothes in top on top of or inside the dryer to just hanging them in the closet. Right one point. Another example is setting boundaries. Again, this is a something that happened for real in my life that had a big impact. I was volunteering with an organization that I had been for years. And I did like it and I enjoy doing stuff. But they asked me to do something that at the time, I was just way too busy to do. Now, a lot of times in the past, I would have gone ahead and done it, I would have found a way to squeeze it into my schedule. And even though it was a sacrifice, it was taking away from things that I really cared about. But in this case, I said no, no can do. I am way too busy, I can't do it. And it wasn't actually well received. And that's fine, too, because that gave me an opportunity to just accept that that happens sometimes. And it had such a huge impact for my confidence because I realized, like, I put my foot down. And I made a little choice. That bumped me up that scale. That was actually like a good two or three pointer right there. These are just a couple of examples of little day in and day out choices that you can make. And just one point, bump yourself up one point, right? You don't have to take a big leap or drastic change to say how can I make this choice in a way or take this action in a way that bumps me up one point in having firm trust in myself in being able to rely on myself. All this week, we've been looking at ways that you can boost your own self confidence. And the truth of the matter is that the only way that you get better at anything is through practice. So practicing being confident and taking confident action begets self confidence. Now, I've shared my own personal examples, because I wanted to illustrate the ideas. But also this has been a very empowering part of my journey, and has improved every single aspect in my life in really profound ways. I want the same thing for you. So get out there and practice being your own, most reliable friend right to have complete trust and faith in yourself. The more you take action, the more you internalize the actual confidence. You got to go out and do it.