The Kristen Becker Podcast

Don't Stay Mad

August 06, 2021 Kristen Becker Season 2 Episode 28
The Kristen Becker Podcast
Don't Stay Mad
Kristen Becker Subscription
Become a supporter of the show!
Starting at $3/month
Support
Show Notes Transcript

If you are fairly consistent and intentional about how you approach your own personal growth, you will find that what I am talking about today are two of the nicest benefits!  One is a much faster recovery time from upsetting situations. Listen to find out more and also what you can do to improve it even more!

Support the show

Donate: I appreciate your support! It helps me to create more free content for everyone. Transformation is an inside job!

Unknown:

Let's talk about increasing your rate of success in personal growth. And what all people who take their personal growth fairly seriously are going to experience. I found the one commonality, well, maybe two. And here's the, I guess the catalyst for me going down this path today with you, I had a challenging experience where I had a negative emotion, it was a pretty intense negative emotion, right? Basically, end of story, it was less than 48 hours for me to not only process and neutralize that experience, but to even get completely on the other side, where I saw what an amazing gift it was, and all of the hidden treasures, all the silver linings in that experience right. Now, 15 years ago, this would have been a very different story, it would have probably been months, right before I would have been able to get through that process, and let it go. And what I used to do habitually, because I learned it growing up, you know, from the people around me and society and everything was tell the story, you keep retelling the story. And then you keep re experiencing the emotions within you. And emotions are very sticky. So together, these two things are keeping it very much alive and keeping you trapped in the pain part of the process, and not moving through the resolution part of the process. Currently, my process that I use is more or less like this, I realize oh, crap, I feel like crap. Something's going on. What is it? What am I feeling? process the feelings? Let them come out? Because you don't want to suppress them. Figure out your intentions? What do you need? What do you want in the situation? And taking action? What can you do to find the resolution, right? That is satisfactory to you. And then to practice forgiveness, because you don't want to also carry along with you some resentment or anger towards the people or the situation or whatever, that initially you felt was the catalyst for the experience. So that is the process that I'm currently using. And another really important thing about personal growth is that when you have a win, you really want to celebrate the win. So when I sat down and realized, like holy crap, is like my personal, best 48 hours, that's stunning to me, based on my current level of experiences that I've had right in my life. And that's the only way you can measure your successes based against, you know, what you would have been prior or formerly. And that end, it made me think about this fellow that I saw speaking. And he said that he somebody approached him to talk about a YouTube video that he had made several years prior, he went back and attempted to watch the video. And he said, he just couldn't, he's like, I've grown so much, I'm not even that person anymore. It feels weird, you know, to see that document. And I have felt that way myself, that really resonated with me. And that's the universal one of the universal things, I wanted to point out that when you do take your personal growth fairly seriously, you know, some people are different places in the range of how much they enjoy. toying with it, I guess I'd say you're going to evolve, you're going to grow. That's like why I guess it's called personal growth, right. And, and so that's super cool. It's and it's, even though it might be a little cringy, to look back and see how maybe you used to handle things or what you thought or what you did, we're always all of us, you know, doing the best that we can for wherever we are right now. And that's just a really beautiful thing to be aware of. The other universal aspect that I wanted to speak to With this in mind, is the rate of time that it takes to get through the process. Now I just shared with you that considering the state of emotion that I was at, that I was at when I wasn't feeling great about everything, to the time that I was feeling great about it was a 48 hours and probably you know previously that would have been so much longer. And everybody that I know everybody that I work with everybody that I've ever talked to, has shared that this is what they have found as well, that the rate of time that it takes for you to achieve your successes, I'm just going to use that word right keeps getting shorter and shorter. It's this exponential growth in your personal development, and just crazy decrease in time that it takes to achieve the state the feeling that you want to be in on whatever it is that you're working on. Now, what's going to happen next, I don't know Well, my time just gets shorter. Well, my process change. Will I get into a state where it doesn't even become an issue? You know, these are all things that I have to look forward to. I'm still growing so I'll find out when I get there. However, I do feel that one of the keys to increasing the speed at which you are able to achieve the successes or achieve your ideal state or your peak state really has a lot to do with Monday morning quarterbacking, you know, examining the process, giving yourself a pat on the back for the wins, right? All easy stuff that anybody can do but is super effective.