As if it's not bad enough that someone can jack up your day, we often let them jack up a whole week, or worse- even longer because we can stop ruminating about what they did. This is one of the tools in my emotional emergency toolkit to help stop the ruminating when you are angry with someone
If you missed it, be sure to check the episode right before this where I share my emergency tool for getting off the emotional treadmill.
Do you ever get so frustrated and angry with someone that you cannot stop ruminating about it, you keep revisiting it. You keep thinking about what a jerk they were, and you don't how wrong this was. And it just, it's a horrible thing. Because you're going throughout your day, you're like, add No, get out of my head, you know, I want to focus on the good things, I want to focus on me, I want to move beyond this. And what I want to share with you today is something that I consider my kind of emergency forgiveness practice, I do this, find myself keep revisiting the emotions and the ideas of something and I'm like, I just want to let it go. I just want to be done with it. Now, I want to preface this by saying this is an emergency forgiveness practice. When you find yourself ruminating, of course, you want to acknowledge your feelings, allow them to be released from you, right? I'm not saying that this is a band aid for you know, I don't want people to suppress their feelings, because that's not good. And the thing is, when we suppress our feelings, or when we continue to keep a negative emotion alive by revisiting the story, revisiting the narrative, we are keeping all of our energy in that low vibrational state. I mean, I feel like we just it's obvious, right? It doesn't feel good. It doesn't serve us in any way, shape, or form. So it's helpful, just to have a little emergency technique, that if you find yourself in this situation, as I surely have, that you can have a little something to go to, I like to have practical things that I can just sit down and say, let me do this thing. And see if it helps the end. It does, I found it's amazing. I also want to preface this by saying that if you've never done this, initially, it's super okay to fake it until you make it. I've definitely been in that part of the journey myself where I'm like doing it and thinking, Nah, really, I really hope that something terrible happens to them, because I'm so mad, right. But as you continue to do it, then you really start letting go of that and being like now, this is good. So let me just jump in. And without further ado, share with you this little method that you can just start exploring and experimenting with in your life. So what I like to do is give this process my full attention, sit down, take a deep breath, allow myself to relax, right. And I just gently let the image of the person come into my mind. I imagine them smiling at first, right. And if you can relate to the idea of as you move from, say, a stressful state to a relaxed state how your shoulders kind of drop. And you can kind of feel your own energy lifting and your heart energy raising, I picture that person doing this. And I like to picture them sort of sitting in a chair. And at the beginning, they might be kind of more alert on the edge of the chair, right as we all often are when we feel fearful or stressed or in a stressful situation. But then as they relax, I picture them smiling. Maybe say somebody did something that was kind or helpful or supportive to them. I don't know, it doesn't matter. But I picture them just smiling and feeling good. And then I picture them sort of resting back more easily in the chair with that feeling of peace and safety and comfort and, and a big smile on their face. And then I like to picture them even laughing something has really taken them out of their stresses and their worries and into the present moment. And they're just laughing and there's this big smile on their face. And then I like to just let this image fade away. And I think to myself, I'm just letting them have this. Okay, I'm letting it go. And this is amazing. I'm like I'm happy just talking about it. I'm happy to sharing it with you in remember that. On the one hand, yes, this is a gift to truly just be like, You know what, it's okay. They wouldn't be such a stress creating person if and when they feel this wonderful sense of peace that we all deserve. I wish that for them. This is kind of my visual prayer to them. And it does I find really empowered me to let go of those negative feelings and those ruminating thoughts that go along with it. So please give it a whirl. Try it out, see what it holds for you. And I hope that you enjoy it and it brings you a lot of peace. You deserve to be at peace. And I will talk to you very soon.